My journey into helping people heal from trauma began 22 years ago when I became a therapist for children & young people who had been traumatised or abused. It is an extraordinary experience being able to help a child in that level of emotional pain, to be the person who listens to their pain as they feel it and express it and believes them, to be a person that embodies the compassion and safety that they need in order to heal. On my journey I found that often the parents & foster carers of these children were also carrying their own pain from traumatic experiences in their childhood, adolescence & into their early twenties and in helping the children I also needed to give therapeutic space to Mum or foster Mum. So it began that I understood that there are so many adults who have been silently carrying around their trauma from childhood, had been focused & driven with the need for success & achievements, but were burdened by the pain, shame, fear and anxiety that their past had wrapped around them.
I knew that I needed to be giving women the same safety, the same ‘heart ears’ of listening & the same level of compassion so that they could heal
My work doesn’t feel like work, it feels much more a connection. A connection to each and every woman I guide to healing, a connection to her inner wounded child who didn’t have someone like me at the time to help them heal, a connection to the joy & liberation I see when a she has finished working with me. It is a gift.
Throughout our lives we absorb the experiences, the associated belief system, and the emotional & psychological reactions & responses to those experiences. When they have been traumatic, the reactions and responses become ones of trauma. You live with fear, shame, guilt and in survival mode. These do many things to you but in the main they ultimately exhaust you. You carry on trying to do all the things, but you lose yourself in the process.
How do I know? Because I’ve been there too. I’m been emotionally burnout & mentally exhausted, had no space for self compassion, ran on empty trying to create perfectionism, to be good enough, to be seen as the ‘go to’ woman! It wasn’t sustainable and it was an accumulation of traumatic & stressful experiences that got me to that point. In admitting I was at that point & actively investing in myself to do something about it, I found my self compassion. I let it in and I discovered truly how powerful it was on my healing journey.
Coupling that personal experience with my professional expertise is how I approach working with you. In order for you to feel safe to move out of survival mode, you have to feel compassion from me.