Childhood Sexual Abuse: How Therapy Helps Reclaim Your Life

Childhood Sexual Abuse: How Integrative Therapy Helps Survivors Reclaim Their Lives

Breaking the shame cycle of childhood sexual abuse isn’t impossible.

Childhood sexual abuse (CSA) is a deeply traumatic experience that can have devastating effects on a survivors mental, emotional & physical well-being

For CSA survivors, the impact of such experiences often extends far beyond the initial incident, leading to a devastating cycle of confusion, shame, secrecy, and shattered self-worth. However, I firmly believe every individual possesses the transformative capacity to break this cycle and empower a reclaiming of  their life. I have witnessed this for all ages over the last 24 years.

I’ll explore the impact of childhood sexual abuse, the shame experienced by survivors, and highlight how integrative therapy approaches facilitate healing and growth.

For clarity I am referring to the NSPCC ‘s definition of both contact and non-contact CSA.

The Impact of Childhood Sexual Abuse

The impact of childhood sexual abuse is profound and far-reaching, with repercussions that can linger long into adulthood. Survivors often experience a wide range of emotional, psychological, and physical challenges.

The abuse experienced shapes nervous system regulation, mind-body connection, beliefs, behaviours and self perception.

The trauma can deeply affect self-esteem and self-worth, leading to feelings of shame, guilt, and a distorted sense of identity. Trust issues, difficulty forming healthy relationships (attachment), and an overwhelming sense of vulnerability are common struggles faced by survivors.

Additionally, the trauma may manifest in symptoms such as anxiety, depression, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and, if over a period of episodes and time, CPTSD (learn more about CPTSD here¬†What is CPTSD?,) dissociation, and various somatic experiences. It is crucial to acknowledge and validate the immense impact of CSA in order to pave the path towards healing and reclaiming one’s life. You can read more about the long term impact in a recent blog post¬†Long-Term Effects of Childhood Sexual Abuse

The internalisation of shame is a common outcome that hinders the recovery process, and further perpetuates the cycle of abuse.

Recognising the importance of a holistic approach to recovery, integrative therapy has emerged as a powerful modality to help survivors break free from the shame cycle and reclaim their lives.

Toxic Shame & CSA

Shame following CSA can be intensely painful and destructive to one’s sense of self and place in the world.

Silence, secrecy & hypoarousal (freeze and submit) survival reactions perpetuate the cycle of shame around CSA with survivors bearing the weight of guilt, fear and pain and silently carrying the burden alone often for many years. Many survivors of CSA often carry an overwhelming sense of deep shame, feeling responsible for the abuse or believing they somehow deserved it. Believing themselves as damaged, unworthy and unlovable, often reinforced when the family or friends of a survivor minimises or dismisses the individuals experiences. They may also have experienced this from professionals or people in authority too.

When you experience shame in a deeply vulnerable state of  sexual abuse/sexual assault and this is compounded upon over a period of time, it becomes toxic and negatively affects your sense of self, your relationships with others, and the way you view the world.

The chronic self blame morphs into shame.

This becomes your normal.

This Toxic Shame is the number one reason for preventing survivors seeking help, sharing their experiences and moving forward in their healing journey.

It is possible though to learn how to identify shame-based body sensations & impulses alongside the shame-based emotional, and to rewire, reframe and re-identify your inherent self worth and value.

Shame-based body sensations.

You may be wondering what I mean by shame-based body sensations? They do vary from person to person but in my experience with individuals these are common ones. However, this list is not exhaustive.

  • Tension or tightness in the muscles, particularly in the pelvic area, jaw, neck and shoulders.
  • Nausea or stomach discomfort, often referred to as a “tight knot” in the stomach.
  • Feeling hot or flushed, accompanied by sweating or rapid breathing.
  • A sense of heaviness or numbness in the body, making it difficult to move or feeling disconnected from the body
  • Trembling or shaking hands, legs, or overall body trembling.
  • Racing heartbeat or palpitations.
  • Shortness of breath or difficulty breathing.
  • Feeling physically frozen or stuck, unable to move or react.
  • Chronic pain or tension in different areas of the body.
  • Feeling fidgety or restless, unable to relax.

Integrative therapy offers a safe space and specialised techniques to address and dismantle this physical, emotional and psychological shame.

The Role Of Integrative Therapy

Integrative therapy, drawing from multiple therapeutic approaches and techniques, aims to holistically address the needs of childhood sexual abuse survivors by considering the individual as a whole – mind, body and spirit. The body – mind is where the transformation takes place.

Some of the effective modalities used in integrative therapy include somatic experiencing, internal family systems (IFS), eye movement desensitisation & reprocessing (EMDR), mindfulness based practices, compassionate inquiry, art therapy and more.

These approaches work together to foster healing on various levels, offering survivors the tools needed to  empower themselves and reclaim their lives.

The whole system must be included in healing.

Reclaiming Empowerment and Building Resilience

Integrative therapy provides survivors of CSA with a compassionate and empowering environment where they can integrate and redefine their experiences. Through the therapeutic co-regulation, survivors are guided towards


  • Understanding the body’s reactions and responses
  • Addressing underlying shame and negative self-beliefs – overcoming the shame and stigma
  • Regulating the nervous system out of threat survival patterns
  • Moving beyond fear
  • Creating an internal sense of safety
  • Managing memories and triggers
  • Bringing a newly felt sense of safety and awareness to the body
  • Cultivating self compassion, confidence and resilience
  • Moving from emotional fragility to agility
  • Establishing healthy connections and boundaries
  • Feeling safe in your own skin

Ultimately, integrative therapy empowers survivors to take back control of their own life.

The ‘Whole’ Approach To Recovery & Healing

Integrative therapy recognises the interconnectedness of mind-body-spirit. In the healing process there’s attuned recognition of the mind and body connection because the brain is interconnected with the entire body through the peripheral nervous system and the signals from the body’s physiological processes.

None of your body is ‘working’ in isolation.¬†

It’s essential to understand that the traumatic experiences endured during this sensitive phase of development throughout childhood impacts not only on the brain/psyche but also the physical body on a sensory cellar level. Therefore the manifestation of CSA often lingers into adulthood in the form of somatic symptoms such as chronic physical pain, chronic fatigue, tension, flashbacks, TMJ , autoimmune conditions (and more) along with the emotional and psychological impacts. These are all inter-connected.

Acknowledging and addressing the mind-body connection becomes crucial in empowering survivors to embark on a truly holistic healing journey. By fostering awareness in how trauma is stored and expressed within the body, we explore various therapeutic approaches that combine psychological & emotional based interventions with somatic & polyvagal based interventions. By integrating mind and body in therapy, survivors have a profound opportunity to reclaim the sense of self and facilitate lasting healing from the deep wounds of CSA.

The Importance of Establishing Support Systems.

In addition to individual therapy, integrative therapy encompasses the importance of building strong support systems for survivors. Connecting with support groups, peer mentorship programs, and other safe networks can help alleviate the isolation and stigma of associated with CSA.

A strong support system can create a healthy sense of belonging, validation and understanding, further aiding the overall healing process.

In creating The Hope Haven I wanted to create a place for people to feel this connection and support whilst also being able to access 1-2-1 therapy with me via the community.

In Conclusion

Breaking the shame cycle of CSA is a complex and courageous journey. Integrative therapy offers a multifaceted approach that recognises both individual emotional and physiological needs, creating a safe and empowering space for healing. By addressing and dismantling shame through the use of various therapeutic techniques, integrative therapy paves the way for survivors to reclaim their lives, embrace their resilience, and foster a renewed sense of hope, self-worth and empowerment.

Meet Helen

Thank you for taking the time to read this newest article and I hope that it has provided inspiration for your healing journey too.

I have been a trauma therapist now for the last 24 years working with children and adults of all ages. Psychotherapy trained I now have an integrative approach which includes Somatic Experiencing, IFS, Polyvagal, Compassionate Inquiry, EMDR and Attachment Therapy, amongst others.

It is an honour for me to be able to provide all of this in the therapeutic relationship.

I have various ways you can connect with me for more inspiration, motivation and guidance.

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Looking forward to connecting. Sending much love. Helen